DFL 2016 Week 17: A New Champion Emerges.

Well, it's the new year and that means that another year for the DFL is officially in the books.  And, man was this a fun year.  However, before I get into those specifics, something was brought to my attention over the holiday that I feel that I should remedy here.  Apparently, I have been ignoring Patrick in the write ups all season.  As he is the new champion, I feel that I really should fix this in his victory week.  So, the following sentences have references to Patrick in them:

• Patrick lives in Pennsylvania.
• Patrick does not like being called Pat.
• Patrick is afraid of water foul.
• Sorry - I jut fact checked that last one.  Patrick is afraid of being hit while playing water polo.  Technically, it is a water foul, but the last point was probably misleading.
• Patrick has an average of 2 arms.
• Patrick has a mean of 2 legs.  
• Patrick pronounces the "h" in whip when he says "Cool Whip", but does not when he says "Bull Whip."
• Patrick says "bull whip" a lot.
• This is not a picture of Patrick:

OK, it is Patrick, but a different one.

I think that's enough to float the average Patrick mention to a proper level this year.

Now, let's talk about some specifics.

Pick 'ems!  For the love of Pete.  Nothing can be easy can it?  I went 0-4 this week on picks, and the only other person who made picks was Mike, who went 1-3.    Grumble, grumble, grumble. So,overall I still win the Gold, but Mike does pull in the honorable mention for post season picks.

Overall Pick 'ems:

Gold:  Phil

Silver:  Mike

Bronze:  Terri

(Terri and Dave were tied, but Terri made more picks, so that's the tie breaker.)

Post Season Pick'ems:

Gold:  Mike

Silver: Phil

Bronze:  Dave

And just to be sure that this is all in the same place

Elimination League:

Gold:  Phil

Silver:  Mike, Marie, Ben, and Terri (Thanks Chicago!)

Now week 17 games!  Starting low, working our way high.

RA Dave vs. Kookie  Now, I know that this wasn't high on anyone's RADAR, but man what a screwed up game this was!  Kookie managed to complete his post season slide into Playoff bitch with his third straight loss. But that's not the interesting thing.  The interesting thing is that his QB pulled in over 30 points AND his defense scored 26 points themselves!  Should have won, right?  Well, no.  When you start 1 suspended player and 2 on IR, well....

But don't get too cocky, RA Dave.  You missed being play off bitch by less than 2 points.

Crutch vs. McClennen  Can we just... OK.  If the last game wasn't ignored enough, this game was straight up forgotten.  Now, to be fair, Crutch has been not setting a line up ALL FREAKING SEASON, so in a game where nobody looks at their line up, he kinda does have the advantage.  SO, yeah, he won this own.  Somehow, this was also a close game, with McClennen just losing by less than 4 points.  This pretty much sums up this shit show of a game:

More like Sandra Oh NO!, amiriteguys?

And now we're getting to the games where people were still locked in....

Mike vs Phil  Damn it...   DAMN IT.  DAMMIT!!!

Yeah, I lost it.  Mike and I finally meet in the last week again, and *this* happens.  And by "*this*", I mean mean team completely mediocred out on iteslf.  Coupla double digit teams, but nothing to really write home about.  On the flip side, Mike had a slightly higher mediocre day and was able to put this one away with a 9 point margin.   On the plus side of this match up, Mike actually changed his team name to the more appropriate "2016(Bronze)Champs."  Cute, but not enough to kill the sting of this loss.

Next year, G...

Patrick vs. Ben  This is the most delicious game ever.  

Yeah, officially, I was rooting for Ben.  BUT, here's the thing.  Patrick, in all of his wisdom started Zach Ertz, who scored 24 points.  Ben's TE scored a paltry 5 points.  And the final score?  You guessed it, Patrick beat Ben by 19 points.  So, it was all about the TEs in the championship game.  Thank you, Patrick.  Awesome choice!    This is what it must feel like... when doves cry.

I don't know what it means, but man it's nice to see the devoted TE slot cement itself
in the league always and forever!

So, congratulations to Patrick, our big winner this year!

Here's the break down of how we ended the year:

Rank	Team	W-L-T	Pts For	Pts Agnst	Streak	Waiver	Moves
*1	Bortle Kombat	7-7-0	1038.85	993.79	L-1	11	18
*2	TightEndsSuck	7-7-0	951.82	990.20	L-2	6	19
*3	2016(Bronze)Champs	10-4-0	1076.41	975.35	L-2	10	22
*4	PhilBack King	7-7-0	998.16	939.43	W-2	12	33
*5	Paranormal Soul Guy	7-7-0	928.14	840.60	L-1	5	-
*6	NotTheWorst	9-5-0	1038.92	906.62	W-6	8	3
*7	Homebrewin'	8-6-0	904.14	911.29	W-2	7	14
*8	S-Bricks2WaiverWire	9-5-0	1090.65	875.68	W-1	9	12
9	anotherTERRIbleteam	6-8-0	846.63	1066.41	L-2	4	9
10	ScoobyDoo	5-9-0	874.72	985.93	W-1	3	10
11	ForsettInTheRear	5-9-0	840.76	951.83	W-4	2	7
12	MuleDay97	4-10-0	929.63	1081.70	L-3	1	6

Which means that this is the draft order for next year:

1. Melanie
2. Skoot
3. Missy
4. Terri (2016 Queen of the Losers!)
5. Kookie (2016 Playoff Bitch)
6. RA Dave
7. McClennen
8. Crutch
9. Phil
10. Mike (2016 Bronze)
11. Ben (2016 Silver)
12. Patrick (2016 Gold)

I was gonna do some calculatin' about stats this year, but check this out.  Yahoo! does it for us now:

https://football.fantasysports.yahoo.com/f1/338316/recordbook?type=headtohead

All time stuff too!  Damn, Yahoo!  You awesome!  

Though, just to be sure that this isn't lost to time, here's our draft rankings 

Draft Grades

• • Paranormal Soul Guy
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • ForsettInTheRear
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • TightEndsSuck
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • PhilBack King
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • Homebrewin'
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • S-Bricks2WaiverWire
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • anotherTERRIbleteam
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • ScoobyDoo
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • MuleDay97
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • 2016(Bronze)Champs
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • NotTheWorst
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card
• • Bortle Kombat
   
  • 
   
  • Report Card

Just confirming that they mean, all in all, bubcuss!

But you know what does mean bidness?  Point totals!  Let's take a look:

(Note:  Averages are just the top players listed, over the season)

Quarterbacks (Average = 200):

Quarterback	Fan Pts	Inc	Yds	TD	Int	Sack	Rush Att	Rush Yds	Rush TD	2PT	Lost
Aaron Rodgers GB	325.4	209	4428	40	7	35	67	369	4	2	4
Matt Ryan Atl	292.3	161	4944	38	7	37	35	117	0	2	2
Drew Brees NO	280.33	202	5208	37	15	27	23	20	2	0	4
Andrew Luck Ind	233.83	199	4240	31	13	41	64	341	2	2	5
Kirk Cousins Was	230.33	200	4917	25	12	23	34	96	4	0	3
Tom Brady NE	230.02	141	3554	28	2	15	28	64	0	1	0
Dak Prescott Dal	228.68	148	3667	23	4	25	57	282	6	0	4
New Derek Carr Oak	226.79	203	3937	28	6	16	39	70	0	5	3
Ben Roethlisberger Pit	217.31	181	3819	29	13	17	16	14	1	3	2
Marcus Mariota Ten	208.42	175	3426	26	9	23	60	349	2	0	5
Philip Rivers SD	199.08	229	4386	33	21	36	14	35	0	0	5
Matthew Stafford Det	198.38	206	4327	24	10	37	37	207	2	1	2
Jameis Winston TB	188.05	222	4090	28	18	35	53	165	1	3	6
Blake Bortles Jax	185.16	257	3905	23	16	34	58	359	3	2	6
Tyrod Taylor Buf	181.54	167	3023	17	6	42	95	580	6	2	2
Russell Wilson Sea	178	193	4219	21	11	41	72	259	1	1	2
Eli Manning NYG	172.98	221	4027	26	16	21	21	-9	0	0	4
Cam Newton Car	167.66	240	3509	19	14	36	90	359	5	2	2
Carson Palmer Ari	167.06	233	4233	26	14	40	14	38	0	1	4
Andy Dalton Cin	166.52	199	4206	18	8	41	46	184	4	0	3
Joe Flacco Bal	159.19	236	4317	20	15	33	21	58	2	4	3
Alex Smith KC	153	161	3502	15	8	28	48	134	5	2	4
New Sam Bradford Min	148.46	157	3877	20	5	37	20	53	0	0	5
Ryan Tannehill Mia	136.01	128	2995	19	12	29	39	164	1	1	3
Colin Kaepernick SF - QBFinal (L) 25-23 vs Sea	133.73	135	2241	16	4	36	69	468	2	1	3

Running Backs (Average = 157):

Running Back	Fan Pts	Att	Yds	TD	Tgt	Rec	Yds	TD	2PT	Lost
David Johnson Ari	273.76	293	1239	16	120	80	879	4	1	3
Ezekiel Elliott Dal	233.25	322	1631	15	40	32	363	1	0	1
LeSean McCoy Buf	209.71	234	1267	13	57	50	356	1	1	0
DeMarco Murray Ten	203.53	293	1287	9	67	53	377	3	0	1
Le'Veon Bell Pit	200.57	261	1268	7	94	75	616	2	1	1
Devonta Freeman Atl	193.41	227	1079	11	65	54	462	2	0	1
LeGarrette Blount NE	188.42	299	1161	18	8	7	38	0	0	1
Melvin Gordon SD	171.73	254	997	10	57	41	419	2	0	2
Mark Ingram NO	165.29	205	1043	6	58	46	319	4	2	2
Jordan Howard Chi	153.95	252	1313	6	50	29	298	1	0	1
Jay Ajayi Mia	150.34	260	1272	8	35	27	151	0	0	1
Latavius Murray Oak	149.59	195	788	12	43	33	264	0	0	1
Frank Gore Ind	144.41	263	1025	4	47	38	277	4	0	1
Carlos Hyde SF	135.89	217	988	6	33	27	163	3	1	3
Isaiah Crowell Cle	134.23	198	952	7	53	40	319	0	0	2
Tevin Coleman Atl	133.01	118	520	8	40	31	421	3	0	0
New Lamar Miller Hou	128.55	268	1073	5	39	31	188	1	0	1
Todd Gurley LA	127.58	278	885	6	58	43	327	0	0	1
Jeremy Hill Cin	127.39	222	839	9	27	21	174	0	0	0
Matt Forte NYJ	125.72	218	813	7	43	30	263	1	0	1
Bilal Powell NYJ	120.65	131	722	3	75	58	388	2	0	1
Spencer Ware KC	119.78	214	921	3	42	33	447	2	0	3
Terrance West Bal	114.04	193	774	5	45	34	236	1	0	0
Jonathan Stewart Car	111.33	218	824	9	21	8	60	0	0	2
Ryan Mathews Phi	109.17	155	661	8	14	13	115	1	2	2

Wide Receivers  (Average = 114 (top 50), 121 (top 40), 128 (top 30), 132 (top 25)):

Offense	Fan Pts	Att	Yds	TD	Tgt	Rec	Yds	TD	TD	2PT	Lost
Jordy Nelson GB	180.78	0	0	0	152	97	1257	14	0	0	1
Antonio Brown Pit	176.96	3	9	0	154	106	1284	12	0	0	0
Mike Evans TB	176.84	0	0	0	173	96	1321	12	0	2	0
Odell Beckham Jr. NYG	162.78	1	9	0	169	101	1367	10	0	0	1
Davante Adams GB	149.38	0	0	0	121	75	997	12	0	1	1
Tyreek Hill KC	142.02	24	267	3	83	61	593	6	3	0	1
Michael Thomas NO	141.48	0	0	0	121	92	1137	9	0	0	2
T.Y. Hilton Ind	141.42	0	0	0	155	91	1448	6	0	1	0
Doug Baldwin Sea	140.63	3	2	0	125	94	1128	7	0	0	0
Brandin Cooks NO	135.92	6	30	0	117	78	1173	8	0	0	0
Michael Crabtree Oak	134.62	0	0	0	145	89	1003	8	0	1	0
Julio Jones Atl	133.86	0	0	0	129	83	1409	6	0	0	0
Larry Fitzgerald Ari	128.65	2	5	0	150	107	1023	6	0	0	1
Rishard Matthews Ten	122.3	0	0	0	108	65	945	9	0	0	1
Amari Cooper Oak	121.62	1	0	0	132	83	1153	5	0	2	0
Tyrell Williams SD	118.86	0	0	0	119	69	1059	7	0	0	0
Demaryius Thomas Den	116.32	0	0	0	144	90	1083	5	0	1	2
Jarvis Landry Mia	115.47	5	17	0	131	94	1136	4	0	1	2
Jamison Crowder Was	113.25	2	-2	0	99	67	847	7	1	0	1
Julian Edelman NE	113.04	12	57	0	159	98	1106	3	0	1	2
Golden Tate Det	112.85	10	4	0	135	91	1077	4	0	1	1
Terrelle Pryor Sr. Cle	111.81	8	21	1	140	77	1007	4	0	1	0
Emmanuel Sanders Den	111.05	1	4	0	137	79	1032	5	0	0	0
Sterling Shepard NYG	109.89	3	31	0	105	65	683	8	0	0	0
Allen Robinson Jax	109.82	0	0	0	151	73	883	6	0	1	0
Kelvin Benjamin Car	109.14	0	0	0	118	63	941	7	0	0	1
Dez Bryant Dal	109.09	0	0	0	96	50	796	8	0	0	1
Anquan Boldin Det	104.86	0	0	0	95	67	584	8	0	0	0
Mike Wallace Bal	104.75	5	31	0	117	72	1017	4	0	1	0
Kenny Stills Mia	104.04	0	0	0	81	42	726	9	0	0	0
Willie Snead NO	103.05	0	0	0	104	72	895	4	0	0	0
Brandon LaFell Cin	102.35	1	-2	0	107	64	862	6	0	0	0
Adam Thielen Min	102.18	2	15	0	92	69	967	5	0	0	1
Kenny Britt LA	102.08	0	0	0	111	68	1002	5	0	0	1
Cole Beasley Dal	101.19	1	7	0	98	75	833	5	0	0	0
DeAndre Hopkins Hou	101.16	0	0	0	151	78	954	4	0	0	0
Steve Smith Sr. Bal	100.96	0	0	0	101	70	799	5	0	2	0
New Pierre Garcon Was	99.14	0	0	0	114	79	1041	3	0	0	0
Stefon Diggs Min	96.79	3	10	0	112	84	903	3	0	0	0
Marqise Lee Jax	96.37	6	35	0	105	63	851	3	1	0	1
A.J. Green Cin	95.56	0	0	0	100	66	964	4	0	0	0
Cameron Meredith Chi	94.97	1	6	0	97	66	888	4	0	0	2
DeSean Jackson Was	92.2	0	0	0	100	56	1005	4	0	0	0
Marvin Jones Jr. Det	88.9	1	3	0	103	55	930	4	0	0	0
Quincy Enunwa NYJ	88.08	1	12	0	105	58	857	4	0	0	0
Jordan Matthews Phi	86.66	0	0	0	117	73	804	3	0	0	0
Taylor Gabriel Atl	86.06	4	51	1	50	35	579	6	0	0	0
Dontrelle Inman SD	85.4	0	0	0	97	58	810	4	0	0	0
J.J. Nelson Ari	85.25	4	83	1	74	34	568	6	0	0	1
Ted Ginn Jr. Car	83.61	14	98	0	95	54	752	4	0	0	2

Tight Ends (Average = 83):

Tight End	Fan Pts	Rec	Yds	TD	2PT	Lost
Kyle Rudolph Min	117.1	83	840	7	0	0
Travis Kelce KC	113.17	85	1125	4	1	0
Delanie Walker Ten	107.23	65	800	7	0	0
Greg Olsen Car	102.92	80	1073	3	1	0
Cameron Brate TB	102.9	57	660	8	0	0
Jimmy Graham Sea	101.42	65	923	6	0	2
Martellus Bennett NE	98.21	55	701	7	0	0
Zach Ertz Phi	95.64	78	816	4	0	0
Jordan Reed Was	94.44	66	686	6	0	1
Antonio Gates SD	88.42	53	548	7	0	1
Hunter Henry SD	83.12	36	478	8	0	1
Dennis Pitta Bal	82.16	86	729	2	0	1
Jack Doyle Ind	80.86	59	584	5	0	1
Jason Witten Dal	77.42	69	673	3	0	1
Charles Clay Buf	74.58	57	552	4	0	0
Coby Fleener NO	74.37	50	631	3	0	0
C.J. Fiedorowicz Hou	73.36	54	559	4	0	0
Dwayne Allen Ind	71.74	35	406	6	1	0
Eric Ebron Det	71.01	61	711	1	0	0
Zach Miller Chi	66.94	47	486	4	0	0
Gary Barnidge Cle	65.98	55	612	2	1	0
Tyler Eifert Cin	60.26	29	394	5	0	0
Vernon Davis Was	57.32	44	583	2	0	0
Lance Kendricks LA	54.96	50	499	2	0	1
Ryan Griffin Hou	52.68	50	442	2	0	1

Defenses (Average = 118):

Defense/Special Teams	Fan Pts	Pts vs.	Sack	Safe	Int	Fum Rec	TD	Blk Kick	Ret Yds	Ret TD
Kansas City KC	177.58	305	28	1	18	15	5	0	1535	3
Minnesota Min	166.93	307	41	1	14	13	4	1	1256	3
Arizona Ari	150.9	344	48	2	14	14	3	2	774	0
Denver Den -	150.28	287	42	0	14	13	4	2	797	0
Philadelphia Phi vs Dal	149.03	331	34	1	16	10	3	3	1202	2
New York NYG	147.9	276	35	0	17	8	4	2	1014	0
New England NE	142.18	250	34	3	13	10	0	3	851	0
Seattle Sea	125.62	290	42	1	11	8	1	3	1057	0
Carolina Car	125.17	376	47	1	17	10	3	3	1030	0
Baltimore Bal	123.7	317	31	0	18	10	2	4	882	0
Tampa Bay TB	123.55	353	38	1	17	12	4	0	573	0
Miami Mia	115.12	374	33	0	16	9	2	4	1207	2
San Diego SD	112	397	35	1	18	10	5	0	720	0
Cincinnati Cin	104.82	313	33	1	17	3	0	3	1249	0
Pittsburgh Pit	104.13	327	38	1	13	10	1	1	788	0
Houston Hou	100.4	322	31	1	11	6	1	0	984	1
Buffalo Buf	100.05	370	39	0	12	6	3	1	1143	0
Los Angeles LA	96.85	358	31	0	10	8	1	2	1491	0
Atlanta Atl -	96.62	394	34	0	12	10	5	2	757	0
Green Bay GB	92.43	382	40	0	17	8	0	0	866	0
Tennessee Ten	90.42	340	40	0	12	6	1	0	865	0
Washington Was	90.23	365	38	0	13	8	0	1	914	1
Detroit Det	88.32	352	26	2	10	4	1	1	1039	2
Oakland Oak	88.23	385	25	0	16	14	1	2	914	0
Dallas Dal	86.5	306	36	0	9	11	0	0	690	0

Kickers (Av = 132):  

Kickers	Fan Pts	0-19 Made	20-29 Made	30-39 Made	40-49 Made	50+ Made	0-19 Miss	20-29 Miss	PAT Made	PAT Miss
Matt Bryant Atl	178	0	12	7	9	6	0	0	56	1
Justin Tucker Bal	174.9	0	4	10	14	10	0	0	27	0
Adam Vinatieri Ind	149	0	3	7	10	7	0	0	44	0
Caleb Sturgis Phi	149	0	12	12	7	4	0	0	30	1
Dustin Hopkins Was	148	0	12	12	7	3	0	0	36	3
Wil Lutz NO	146	1	7	9	8	3	0	0	49	1
Matt Prater Det	146	0	10	4	10	7	0	0	31	2
Dan Bailey Dal	140	0	9	8	7	3	0	0	46	0
Graham Gano Car	138	0	4	9	14	3	0	0	31	3
Sebastian Janikowski Oak	138	1	9	6	10	3	0	0	37	2
Nick Novak Hou	138	1	12	11	8	3	0	0	22	3
Stephen Gostkowski NE	137	0	9	7	9	2	0	0	46	3
Cairo Santos KC	135	0	8	15	6	2	0	1	36	3
Brandon McManus Den	131.4	0	9	10	7	3	0	0	32	1
Jason Myers Jax	131	0	7	3	10	7	0	0	29	3
Steven Hauschka Sea	130	0	11	13	8	1	0	2	29	6
Mason Crosby GB	126	1	6	13	5	1	0	0	44	3
Josh Lambo SD	122	0	7	13	6	0	0	0	42	4
Ryan Succop Ten	117	1	4	6	8	3	0	0	39	2
Chandler Catanzaro Ari	113	1	5	6	6	3	0	1	43	4
Chris Boswell Pit	110	0	2	8	11	0	0	0	36	0
Nick Folk NYJ	109	0	12	10	3	2	0	1	24	2
Roberto Aguayo TB	100	0	5	13	4	0	0	0	32	2
Dan Carpenter Buf	98	1	8	5	4	1	0	0	40	5
Phil Dawson SF	95	0	4	6	7	1	0	0	33	1

:

That's about it for this year. See you suckas around next year!  Peace!