DFL Week 10

Good Morning Fellow DFL'ers, Since Phil is out this week after a freak shaving accident in which he is still swimming around in his own feces hair, I have volunteered to try and phil the void. (yeah! you see what i did there ? I know you're super proud of my punny-ness phil! I'll be here all week)

But before we get started I have a very important question for you.  Are you aware that Phil is THE official moral authority against plagiarism ? Did you know that if he sees you burning a CD as a 'backup' for yourself, that he will literally 'unscrew your head and shit down your neck' ?

Did you know that he's actually on the board of directors for copyright infringement ? Did you know he's friends with Lars Ulrich and will "cap yo ass" if you are found "in violation of Phil" ?

For years Ben and I have fought the good fight and tried to bring Phil to his senses. Come to the dark side of the force. But he cannot be stopped. For God Sake, the man was a holier than though Paladin in his D&D campaign (Thanks McClennen!! that helped a lot). So Phil, I know when you read this post, you're gonna shit yourself when you get to the bottom....of the post. I know we might not be friends anymore after this. I know I will have crossed a line and that you will send your pack of angry Rau wolves after me to that state in the NORTH we call Maryland. But I can't help myself. I have a problem clearly and I can't stop. But i digress....lets talk football and we'll get back to this shortly....

Well Week 10 was fun wasn't it ? :)

CLE Rocks (Kuchi)  vs. It's Not Detroit (Melanie)
You know what's good ? Winning. Winning is always good. But do you know what's even better than winning ? I'll tell ya. Its Melanie winning despite having the 3rd worst score in the league this week. Which really means that there was only one other team you could have beaten since Melanie was utterly destroying her husband this week Poor Kuchi. One of these days buddy you're gonna notch a 1 in that W column. But until then, you get the official Crap on a Stick award for literally being a big giant poopy turd. 

The Artist Formerly Known as Ben vs. TwitterHashTag Boy

In the battle of the symbols this week (because God only knows what both of their team names will be next year ).(Ben if you decide to find a way to make your team name even more unpronounceable...sigh...oh i dunno..like for instance... ....no not the word blank, but actually a team with no actual name ...i swear, Phil or I are gonna have to ORTH the shit out of your house. Just sayin.... And Mike ol' buddy, i'll give ya props, at least you had the courtesy to spell out your team name (i secretly hope you name your team 'SmoothieKing' or 'PrivateDancer').  Mike, you get the Almost There award for almost floating into 8th place this week for the playoffs.  

Ben, you get the Shaft award this week for literally having the 3rd most points in the league and only have 3 wins.

GG Purple Cobras (David) vs. The Mud Turtles (Terri)

Ever have one of those days ? The Purple Cobras had one of those days this weekend and found themselves outscored by more than double their own points. Shit was hard to swallow. All i can say is this.

Terri obviously gets the 'Kicking Him While He's Down' award for....well...you know.

Knightly Yardage (Crutch) vs. ScoobyDoobyDoo (Missy)

Well Crutch, you had it all had but Missy had to go and ruin your day by 18 points this week. In any other week, you woulda won but apparently the Rams DEF decided to come out of the woodwork this week and score a ....wait for it....34 point win. Needless to say. never had a chance. Now go shake hands with missy and take your joint smoke a peace pipe award to make it all better.

WrathPhil vs. The Derailers (Chris M)

Phil, you get the one lucky son of a bitch award this week as McClennen failed to put in...a whole friggin team. to each of you I shout...FAIL. No Soup for You. No trophies this week.

Crap on a Stick 2 (Scott) vs. Cagenado (Patrick)

And in the battle of northern agression this week between the mason-dixon line (yes phil, yes, it's technically between MD and PA, fine fine), Skoot and Patrick duked it out with the Sticks of Crap prevailing to retain the lead over Terri by points for 1st. Patrick gets a pass though this week because he had a baby. And I hear pooping those things out can be 'almost as painful as breaking an arm' so he was probably delirious and not up to speck. And for that you get the 'Preggers award' this week

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So yes, back our discussion of Phil and his non-cd-burning-copying-napster-downloading-non-plagiarism self. I would like you all to know that I've found him out. As they say, the jig is up buddy. This so called original blog you have is the 2nd of it's kind! !!! .  Folks, i give to you the original 'Shenanigans and TomFoolery' blog.

http://www.sebastianvonbuchwald.com/

So keeping that in mind, I say to you "Good job Phil. Welcome to the dark side of the force". I am proud to have you finally come over and join the rest of us who are all horrible people. And with that I now can give you this. Merry Christmas everyone! For those of you that have Android-based phones or tablets this is like 2 seconds to pull. For Ipad's I have not found a way yet since it forces you to have to go through Itunes but if someone can shed some light here , greatly appreciated. Anyways. For those of you that read ESPN or watch The League, ,you will probably recognize the guy on the left. He is the senior fantasy analyst at ESPN and has led one hell of a life that brought him to that point. The book is fantastic and I highly recommend looking into its. 50% of it is about Berry's upbringing as a kid in early fantasy leagues in Texas throughout the 80's, 90's , his time at Syracuse University and then to Hollywood as a writer for shows like Married with Children and Crocodile Dundeee. So 50% isn't even about fantasy football. The other half are all real life stories of real leagues around the nation that do some of the most screwed up stuff to gain advantage/win etc. in their respective leagues. You'll find yourself laughing at almost all of them.

ePub | mobi


And that's it for me. Hope you enjoyed it. Later -Scott