What a week, what a week!! Yes, I won this week, snapping a 5 game losing streak. And the fact that it was the highest score of the week and the second highest score of the year made it that much more delicious. So, I enter this week a Champion. An American Champion. Accordingly, I make my entrance thusly:
(Gimme a break, it's been a rough season. I have to savor the few moments that I can.)
But where is my sense of decorum? We start with the Pick'ems. Ben and Crutch both snagged 5-1 picks this eek. Low men were Phil and Melanie with 3-3. So, Kookie (with 4-2) added another notch to his lead. And now, Crutch is tied with Phil for the number 2 (hehe) slot, and Ben is only 1 pick behind that. Well, shit. How often have Pick'ems been this close this late in the season.
On a side note, I want to thank Mike G an Terri G for their unwavering support this week in the pick'ems. They were the only ones pick me this week. And let me say from the bottom of the league's heart, you two are lucky bastards.
And since we're talking about the Gs, let's get into the biggest note of the season. Terri and Mike were the only ones to make a trade this season. Right under the deadline no less. Just goes to prove that it's easier to make a trade if you actually see a person.
Let's keep the Segue segue going, shall we? Who's top of the league with moves? Not surprisingly, Kookie takes the top spot this week with 29 moves going into week 12. Kookie has been regenerating his team like a troll what its arm cut off. I'm thinking that if Kookie really commits, he might be able to hit 40 moves by the end of regular season. The bigger surprise is that RA Dave is right behind Kookie with 24 moves and RA Dave is currently in 3rd place. Usually, that number of moves lands you... well, lands you where Kookie is. And good on you, Kookie for not letting 10 straight seasons teach you that you need to pick up a player the week before they get hot, not the week after.
With that out of the way, let's get to the games!
The Nerd Bowl, presented by WoC: Phil vs Crutch. Crutch came into the game with a slight favor. Phil walked away with the victory. Why? Because Andre Johnson finally woke up and somehow the San Fran DEF whooped up on Chi-Town. Just goes to show you that anything can happen on Monday nights. I would like to thank Crutch. He had Tony *FUCKING* Romo on his team. Since Romo was benched, he had a poor game. Were he to have started, he would have had a game for the record books... (Fun side note, after this game, Crutch and I are exactly tied on points for the year. Weird, right?)
The So Close I Can Taste It Bowl, sponsored by Hostess (Gord rest their souls): Ben vs. Missy. 1 point difference in this game. Congrats to Missy for having a consistent "meh" team this week. Nothing special really. Most of the team was right around projections. This is in stark contrast to Ben's bunch of filthy creatures that he calls players and Dez Bryant (wha?) and the Baltimore DEF (against the blindingly painful to watch Stillers) who somehow combined to get 51 of the 79 points for the team. Lesson learned here folks: Get the superstars and your other mongrel player will just pad the score for you...
The 'THESE ARE THE BEST TEAMS IN THE LEAGUE' Bowl, sponsored by Dale's Discount Pooh: Melanie versus Patrick. Melanie - You keep riding Brees. That's all that you'll need to do. Patrick. Holy Your Team, man. Sorry, I shouldn't use such foul language. Lemme rephrase. "Holy Shit, Man." Ryan pooped the bed pulling in -4 points. But in his defense, he was playing the powerhouse team known as ... that can't be right... The Cardinals? That's gotta hurt... Then, Goose eggs from Jackson and Bowe... Esh! Whta's really sad is that the 40 points that you snagged wasn't the lowest in the league.
The 'O dear... Here's the number for a battered woman's shelter' Bowl, sponsored by Phil's definitely got to go to sensitivity training for that one: Skoot and Mike G. Mike scored a whopping 113 points (also achieving line up Nirvana) against Skoot's killer 39 points. OK, two of Skoot's players wer on BYE and his QB on Monday night was questionable and didn't start and the TE just got shut out... Ouch Skoot. I talked to Skoot this week and he assures me that he's not out of the league yet. He is fully read to assume the position of spoiler for the remainder of the season. And that's good. His team definitely seems to have spoiled. But that's what happens when you leave a fantasy team out without proper safeguarding it. It stinks! (And Sadly, skoot was just shy of line up Nirvana....)
The Lady Bowl, sponsored by flowers and pretty things, I don't know what you ladies like: JOy vs Terri. The most interesting thing about this game was sitting on the bench. Somehow, Joy's backup QB (Palmer) outscored her starter (Rivers). On Terri's side... 37 points from Matt Schaub? Really? How the hell does this even happen? Plus, Terri's down a player due to the trade with her dear hubby. Pro tip, Ter: Pick up someone. Anyone. Even if you don't need them. That'll prevent someone else from getting them. A term in most leagues known as cock-blocking. However, in this league, due to Melanie's ridiculous ownership of the KC DEF last week, I now dub it "Melanie'ing". Wow. That's a really hard word to say. Sadly, that's gonna be it, cuz "She-Kookie'ing" isn't any better.
The Stopping the Juggernaut, sponsored by "Really? That's Shadowcat? Cuz she was in the first X-Men 5 years ago and was about 10 years older than she is now" (and if you get that reference, good for you!): Kookie vs RA Dave. After dropping six of his first seven games, Kookie entered this game with a 3 game winning streak. Could he possible get into the playoffs? RA Dave said no. And he had perhaps the best smack of the year "Better bring a bib, its going to get messy (shoves waitress carrying food.)" I'm not sure if that was actually a quote from something, but it was awesome. Good on you RA Dave. Also, good on you for hitting the exact number of points that was projected for you. What' gotta be killing Kokie is that he benched the NE DEF (against Indy) and played ATL (against ARI). Definitely the smart thing to do, but it wound up costing him 21 points. Ouch.
All that being said, we've gotten to the last stretch of the regular season. Sure, Melanie and Patrick have locked up playoff births, but with 4 teams tied record wise for the last playoff spot (and with me sitting at the top of them - see the first picture above) and another three teams within striking distance, these next three weeks are going to get intense. So, strap in!
Also, remember, no more BYE weeks - Rah! And you might remember the match ups for the rest of the season... Our last three games will be the teams that we initially played in the first three games. So, strike back and obtain vengeance for a loss at the beginning of the season. Heck, try to keep the team down that you initially beat. End result? Keep on slugging; this season is still going.
Phil, you need to see Dodgeball, possibly Ben Stiller's funniest movie.
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