DDFL 2018 Week 11: O geez O man! How close can we get??

I'm not sure if you have checked the scores today, but Yahoo! kinda was fucked today.   This morning, I checked the app and I had less total points than my players actually got.  Then, I checked on the web site, and I had both scored less points than my oponent AND I was on a winning streak.  It's settled down over the last few hours, so I think that Yahoo! has finally gotten its shit together.

I mean, seriously, Yahoo!  What are you?  Bing?

Anyways, assuming that the right scores are out there.... Jesus Murphy!  What a close week this was, pretty much across the board!!

via GIPHY

Well, that's what the bastard winners feel like.  The rest of us were more like the agent, here:

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Ugh... what a kick in the balls!  And if you won this week, well...

Ugh...  But maybe I'm telegraphing myself too much?  Anyways, FOUR of the games were within 2 points... that's insane!

Well, it took us the better part of the season, but we've finally got ourselves the first champion of the season!  THE ELIMINATION LEAGUE IS FINALLY OVER!!!!  McClennen takes the silver, as he took a strike with his ultimately ballsy move of choosing the Cardinals.  That would be insane most weeks, but it was mitigated by the fact that they were playing the Raiders.  Well, OK they were playing Derek Carr and a bunch of shitty no-names that aren't good enough to be traded.  But they were in Raiders uniforms.   So, there you go.   Anyways, way to go balls to the wall there, McClennnen.  And our Winner... Our Champion ...  Our "You know, that guy... who did the thing??" Josh!!  He took the Saints over the Eagles in what can charitably be called a terribly excruciating destruction.  Well done, good sir!

Live stream of Josh right now.

Pick ems!  So, you remember how I was saying that this week was really close?  Well, it showed in the pick 'ems.  Phil, Mike, and Josh all went 3-3.  Ben went 2-4.  But the big winner?  Crutch pulled in 5-1!  I asked how he was able to make such accurate picks in such a tight week.  Crutch declined to give specifics, but was quoted as saying:

Well done, Crutch.  That means that you jumped to second place.  Here's the full standings:

Phil:  45
Crutch:  38
Ben:  36
Mike:  35
Josh:  35
Terri:  27  (The games not over yet, Terri!  Plenty of time to get back in it!!)

Now, let's get into the games!  And just to point out what a screw up week this was, it should be noted that NOBODY actually made it to 80 points this week.  I mean, I know that we've lowered points and all, but damn.... this was a rough week....

Wasn't quite sure how to gif this, but I'd say that this
summarizes the situation nicely.

Ben (79.99) vs Patrick (77.98).  Well, Patrick through everything that he had at Ben this week, leaving only 6.85 points on the bench.  And had he started that guy, he would have won.  But really,  why the HELL would you start Jalen Richard over Alshon Jeffery?  You wouldn't.  This week was just stupid.  Ben, on the other hand, had plenty to spare.  The weird thing here is that his tight end scored -0.1 points... You know how?  He threw an incomplete pass.  And that's it. 

via GIPHY
(Picture unrelated, but isn't it beautiful?)

Mike (79.85) vs Kyle (78.11).  Battle of the veteran QBs just beating on each other!!!  Kyle's Luck racked up 21 points, and Mike's Brees threw down 27.  Pretty much every postion lined up points-wise, which is interesting.  The big difference here being that Mike's Jordan Reed pulling in solid double digits.  It's almost like the primary QB was bent in a very unnatural way, which lead to the back up QB dumping the ball off a lot.  Almost like that..

I saw the actual hit and believe me, this is easier to watch.

D (77.71) vs Skoot (53.50).  OK, so *technically* Skoot started a full roster.  It's just that two of his players goose egged, and another was left with a single point.  So, even though D's defense went WAY negative, he still was able to administer the beat down of the weak.  Also, just a quick side note... D has Manning and Stafford as QBs.... talk about having to pick from only terrible choices each week.  Geez!

Lemme just look up this reference... o dear... no more using this joke...

Terri (68.41) vs Josh (60.66).  Woah!  Look at Terri!  Pulling in her third win of the season!  Really, the only mistake that she made was putting in the wrong LA Defense.  (To be fair, the Chargers were projected at 5, but only pulled in -0.4, and the Rams were projected at -0.82 and pulled in 6.13 - so who the hell even knows any more???) As for Josh...Well, he had Kirk Cousins, who pulled in 11.47 points.  NOT GOOD ENOUGH.  He also had Big Ben, who scored 15 points.  STILL NOT GOOD ENOUGH!  So he went and picked up Carzon Wentz, who had a mind-boggingly bad -4.8 points and cost him the game.  Maybe a little QB heavy, man... Maybe...  Also, fun side note, Josh actually snaked Wentz away from me on the waiver wire last week... so, like thanks for jumping on that grenade for me, buddy.

Terri - I'm still on your roster, but unable to play for the rest of
the year.  Can you cut me so that I can go back to Florida?

McClennnen (65.77) vs Crutch (64.96).  Man, talk about razor thin victories.  This wasn't even a point of separation.  But hey!  McClennen just doubled his number of wins in a single week!  It really should have been a gimme going into Monday night, but it was a nail biter since Crutch had Hell and Hunt still left to play.  Even though there was over 100 points on Monday night, they couldn't quite put Crutch over the top.

via GIPHY

Stephen (62.74) vs Phil (61.71).  Uggh... I hate being in the "Well, someone has to win" bowl.  But here we are, and it was CLOSE again.  Going into Monday night, I said "Well, as long as Goff doesn't go crazy, I should have this one."  Anyone wanna guess what happened?  Yeah, ANOTHER one of my TEs went on IR.  Oh, yeah, and Goff went buck wild, giving Stephen the game.  And this guy went wild:

Also, side note.  "Goff Gif" is ridiculously fun to type and say.

So, that's it!  Another week in the books.  We're in the short rows now, fellas.  Two teams locked in playoff berths (Patrick and Phil). There's still a lot of competition for the lower slots.  So, have at it!  (McClennen and Terri, I think that if you can make a run here, you're still technically not out yet..  So, keep pounding, as they say.)